Everyone has skeletons in the closet

There seems to be a formula in life that looks something like this: “the louder a person decries the behavior of another, the greater the chances are that there are skeletons in their closet.”
When a person uses their energies to demagogue the immorality and inferiority of other people’s lives, it seems that it will eventually be inevitable that their own cracks in their armor will be glaringly brought to light.
We all have cracks in our armor. We all have skeletons in our closets. And yet, most of us at one point or another have probably felt compelled to shine the spotlight on someone else’s dark corner of the room. There is a reason someone said “people in glass houses shouldn’t  throw stones.” I am dismayed to say that in the past I have flipped on the proverbial flood light, or picked up stones during my life. Those are never our finest moments, so why do we all do it? There could be many reasons. But one could be that it is much easier to tear another down than to do the work to elevate our own thoughts and behaviors.

We are all so fragile in many ways. We are all riding the waves of our own cognitive dissonance--trying to maintain balance and not be enveloped by the pull of the undertow.
I just found a quote that ties in perfectly with this post, and I am thankful that I ran across it at my friend's blog.

"Remember that the first step is not to speak ill of others. All human beings have weaknesses and faults. They have their imperfections. Therefore, before trying to find faults in others and speaking ill of them, try to find your own weaknesses and correct those." 

Let go of what you think you know

I have had so much sadness and frustration surrounding how individuals who were once friends, allies or even family, use religion to control, damage or sever relationships. I have posted about these types of situations at various times in the past.
Recently I read something on a blog that (IMHO) gets it right. Something I wish those aforementioned friends or family would be able to really and truly internalize and live.

Quote: So what is it about? Forget the rules. Forget the religion. My faith is grounded in a relationship with a person. A person who’s an example of how to live right. … Someone who knows me – who really knows me – and who chooses to love me anyway. Someone who has the authority – and chooses to use it –  to forgive me my biggest mistakes. Someone who keeps on giving me second chances. Someone who frees me to get up, brush myself down, and try to do better next time.

The person in Jesus.

YES! I would even add “Amen!” Why is it that Christians hide behind “love…” while cracking a bat to the back of your knees with “…but, hate the sin”?
I have often commented “everything after the ‘but’ is true.”
That is exactly how it feels. It is so disingenuous to hear “I love you, oh… but I hate who you are.” Don't hide behind love to spread hate.

Gay or Straight: One Leg at a Time

One of my favorite sources for humor highlighted this topic:

“Same-sex couples are virtually identical to opposite-sex couples when it comes to age, income, and child rearing according to census data released in the United States. … Just goes to show you, gay people really aren’t all that different from straight people. Except for our extrasensory abilities and ability to wither your crops by blinking, that is.”

So, if this is the case, then why do so many straight people still spend their energies spreading the angst and animosity? Seriously. Gay or straight, we all put our pants on one leg at a time.

upside-down

The Last Word

Have you ever found yourself frustrated or aggravated because a person (or people) have sought you out to harass and besiege? I imagine I am not alone in feeling this. So often energy is spent on wondering "why" such people can't find anything better to do? Wondering "why" people have to bully others? It occurred to me the other day... I know the reason why. And what's more, I was warned.

"Your enemy roams around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour."

It is fairly amazing that I forgot that warning for as long as I had during the last several years. So, in essence, it is no big surprise that our enemies restlessly pace back and forth trolling for someone to devour. Now for the encouragement. The trolls in our lives do not get the last word!

"Keep a cool head. Stay alert. The adversary is poised to pounce, and would like nothing better than to catch you napping. Keep your guard up. You're not the only ones plunged into these hard times. It's the same with Christians all over the world. So keep a firm grip on the faith. The suffering won't last forever. It won't be long before this generous God who has great plans for us in Christ—eternal and glorious plans they are—will have you put together and on your feet for good. He gets the last word; yes, He does."

trolls

behavior

musings

Breaking the Code

In my 4 decades on this plant I have learned many things. One of the things I have learned is that when someone signs a letter with some variation of “Regards” what they are really trying to convey before they end their letter is: “f*ck off and f*ck you.”

Sad, but true… at least the majority of the time. Why do people hide behind benign words to thinly veil their malignant intents? Mostly because they know that the raft of sh*t their true words would reap them is not a hassle they want to deal with (or are brave enough to deal with).

What is worse than that is when people use their kind or sweet words to get what they want out of people — and then when either they do not get that they wanted — or are just “done”... you can be sure those sweet words take a hairpin curve and turn sour!

I didn’t understand it when I was a kid and heard the lessons about the tongue being the smallest member of the body but being capable of the greatest damage. I do now.

Whoever first said “sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me” was one of two things: deaf, or as yet unscathed by the double-edged sword of another’s words. Either way the physical wounds of sticks and stones heal long before the emotional wounds of misused words.

It would be nice if we lived in a world where people accepted self-responsibility and personal accountability for what the words that they put out there do to other people.

HA! I suppose I may as well be wishing for world peace, or a clean energy source apart from the fossil fuels that contaminated our Oceans in the Gulf during the summer of 2010.